This book by the bestselling author of Emotional Intelligence, Daniel Goleman is timely as I believe we are becoming the most distracted generation in recent history. With all the distractions presented by electronic gadgets such as smart phone, tablet, television, etc. and social media such as facebook, twitter, etc., focus has been become a rare commodity. I guess all of us are guilty of being distracted all the time and we may not realise that we are not living up to our full potential simply because we are easily distracted all the time. This book is timely as it shows us that focus is very important in all aspects of our life from working to personal relationship. It also shot down the myth on the importance of multi-tasking and shows us it is more important to be fully engaged at a particular task instead of juggling multiple balls and ended up dropping all the balls. I am a believer that focus is very important and in this age of distractions, the one who is able to stay focus and ignore the distractions will emerge triumphant.
Some excerpts from the book which I hope you will find useful in your journey towards being focus (and stop checking your facebook news) - words in blue are mine:
1) For leaders to get results they need all three kinds of focus. Inner focus attunes us to our intuitions, guiding values, and better decisions. Other focus smooths our connections to the people in our lives. And outer focus lets us navigate in the larger world. A leader tuned out of his internal world will be rudderless; one blind to the world of others will be clueless; those indifferent to the larger systems within which they operate will be blindsided.
2) Writing about the coming information-rich world, he (Nobel-winning economist, Herbert Simon) warned that what information consumes is "the attention of its recipients. Hence a wealth of information creates a poverty of attention." (The challenge for us is to make use of appropriate information and not be swarmed by information overload)
3) ..... Rick Aberman, who directs peak performance for the Minnesota Twins baseball team, tells me, "When the coach reviews plays from a game and only focuses on what not to do next time, it's a recipe for players to choke." (It is always better to be positive than negative)
4) While mind wandering may hurt our immediate focus on some task at hand, some portion of the time it operates in the service of solving problems that matter for our lives.
In addition, a mind adrift lets our creative juices flow. While our minds wander we become better at anything that depends on a flash of insight, from coming up with imaginative wordplay to inventions and original thinking. In fact, people who are extremely adept at mental tasks that demand cognitive control and a roaring working memory - like solving complex math problems - can struggle with creative insights if they have trouble switching off their fully concentrated focus. (The key is knowing when to focus and when to relax. Relaxation of the mind is also important. The part of our brain for intensive focusing also needs a refreshing break)
5) Open time lets the creative spirit flourish; tight schedules kill it.
6) A random survey of thousands of people found focus in the here-and-now understandably was highest by far while they were making love (apparently even among those people who answered that badly timed inquiry from a phone app). A more distant second was exercising, followed by talking with someone, and then playing. In contrast, mind wandering was most frequent while they were working (employers take note), using a home computer, or commuting. (Sex is also good for the mind!)
7) At the neural level mind wandering and perceptual awareness tend to inhibit each other: internal focus on our train of thought tunes out the senses, while being rapt in the beauty of a sunset quiets the mind. This tune-out can be total, as when we get utterly lost in what we're doing.
8) Tightly focused attention gets fatigued - much like an overworked muscle - when we push to the point of cognitive exhaustion. The signs of mental fatigue, such as a drop in effectiveness and a rise in distractedness and irritability, signify that the mental effort needed to sustain focus has depleted the glucose that feeds neural energy.
9) Such restoration (attention restoration) occurs when we switch from effortful attention, where the mind needs to suppress distractions, to letting go and allowing our attention to be captured by whatever presents itself. But only certain kinds of bottom-up focus act to restore energy for focused attention. Surfing the Web, playing video games, or answering e-mail does not.
10) ..... our tone of voice matters immensely to the impact of what we say: research has found that when people receive negative performance feedback in a warm, supportive tone of voice, they leave feeling positive - despite the negative feedback. But when they get positive performance reviews in a cold and distant tone of voice, they end up feeling bad despite the good news.
11) Another antidote to groupthink: expand your circle of connection beyond your comfort zone and inoculate against in-group isolation by building an ample circle of no-BS confidants who keep you honest.
A smart diversification goes beyond gender and ethnic group balance to include a wide range of ages, clients, or customers, and any others who might offer a fresh perspective. (Go and meet people!)
12) "Sunlight", as Supreme Court justice Felix Frankfurter once said, "is the best disinfectant." (This statement refers to transparency as the best policy)
13) Epigenetics, the science of how our environment affects our genes, tells us that inheriting a set of genes is not in itself enough for them to matter. Genes have what amounts to a biochemical on/off switch; if they are never turned on we may as well not have them. The "on" switch comes in many forms, including what we eat, the dance of chemical reactions within the body, and what we learn.
14) Willpower emerged as a completely independent force in life success - in fact, for financial success, self control in childhood proved a stronger predictor than either IQ or social class of the family of origin. (Delayed gratification must be trained from young)
15) High self-control predicts not just better grades, but also a good emotional adjustment, better interpersonal skills, a sense of security, and adaptability.
16) Bottom line: kids can have the most economically privileged childhood, yet if they don't master how to delay gratification in pursuit of their goals those early advantages may wash out in the course of life.
17) Another bottom line: Anything we can do to increase children's capacity for cognitive control will help them throughout life.
18) The timing of the gesture interprets its meaning. If your timing is off, a positive statement can have negative impact.
19) Empathy entails an act of self-awareness: we read other people by tuning in to ourselves.
20) One cost of the frenetic stream of distractions we face today, some fear, is an erosion of empathy and compassion. The more distracted we are, the less we can exhibit attunement and caring.
21) As William Osler, the father of medical residency training, wrote in 1904, a doctor should be so detached that "his blood vessels don't constrict and his heart rate remains steady when he sees terrible sights." Osler recommended doctors have the attitude of a "detached concern."
22) The most robust entity takes in the greatest amount of relevant information, understands it most deeply, and responds most nimbly.
23) Smart practice always includes a feedback loop that lets you recognize errors and correct them - which is why dancers use mirrors. (We must always learn from our mistakes)
24) Positive emotions widen our span of attention; we're free to take it all in. Indeed, in the grip of positivity, our perceptions shift. As psychologist Barbara Fredrickson, who studies positive feelings and their effects, puts it, when we're feeling good our awareness expands from our usual self-centered focus on "me" to a more inclusive and warm focus on"we".
25) ...... positivity, in turn, has great payoffs for performance, energizing us so we can focus better, think more flexibly, and persevere. (Ever wondered why successful people are always positive? I don't think they are positive because they are successful but rather it is because they are positive that they became successful)
26) "You need the negative focus to survive, but a positive one to thrive," says Boyatzis. "You need both, but in the right ratio."
That ratio would do well to flip far more to the positive than the negative, in light of what's known as the "Losada effect," after Marcial Losada, an organizational psychologist who studied emotions in high-performing business teams. Analyzing hundreds of teams, Losada determined that the most effective had a positive/negative ratio of at least 2.9 good feelings to every negative moment (there's an upper limit to positivity: above a Losada ratio of about 11:1, teams apparently become too giddy to be effective). The same ratio range holds for people who flourish in life, according to research by Barbara Fredrickson, who is a psychologist at the University of North Carolina (and a former research associate of Losada). (A balance between negative and positve feelings is important and successful people is generally more positive)
27) Global economic data shows that once a country reaches a modest level of income - enough to meet basic needs - there is zero connection between happiness and wealth. Intangibles like warm connections with people we love and meaningful activities make people far happier than say, shopping or work.
28) Directing attention toward where it needs to go is a primal task of leadership. Talent here lies in the ability to shift attention to the right place at the right time, sensing trends and emerging realities and seizing opportunities. (Leaders take note. One of our main task is to keep the team focus and at the same time are attuned to others and the outside world)
29) Leadership itself hinges on effectively capturing and directing the collective attention. Leading attention requires these elements: first, focusing your own attention, then attracting and directing attention from others, and getting and keeping the attention of employees and peers, of customers or clients.
30) ...... "deciding what not to do is as important as deciding what to do."
31) "The most successful leaders are constantly seeking out new information," says Ruth Malloy, global director of Hay Group's leadership and talent practice.
32) ..... nonacademic abilities like empathy typically outweigh purely cognitive talents in the makeup of outstanding leaders. (We all know why academic abilities alone would not guarantee future success. So, remember to always hone your soft skills like empathy, communication, etc.)
33) Baron-Cohen's research finds that in a small - but significant - number of people this strength (excels at systems analysis) comes coupled with a blind spot for what other people are feeling and thinking, and for reading social situations. For that reason, while people with superior systems understanding are organizational assets, they are not necessarily effective leaders if they lack the requisite emotional intelligence.
In summary, the book is timely for this generation which are constantly distracted. When we say focus, it is not merely at work or the task at hand. It encompasses every aspects of our life. When we are focused on our relationship, the relationship would flourish and we would have meaningful and quality connections with the people we love and care about. If we are distracted, what we have would be superficial connections and it is therefore, not surprising if the relationship do not work out or we feel something is missing. The same thing applies to work, the environment, etc. In summary, we should FOCUS on things that matter in our life, work, etc. during our short adventure on earth and hope that when we leave, we would leave our mark here, in a positive manner of course.
14) Willpower emerged as a completely independent force in life success - in fact, for financial success, self control in childhood proved a stronger predictor than either IQ or social class of the family of origin. (Delayed gratification must be trained from young)
15) High self-control predicts not just better grades, but also a good emotional adjustment, better interpersonal skills, a sense of security, and adaptability.
16) Bottom line: kids can have the most economically privileged childhood, yet if they don't master how to delay gratification in pursuit of their goals those early advantages may wash out in the course of life.
17) Another bottom line: Anything we can do to increase children's capacity for cognitive control will help them throughout life.
18) The timing of the gesture interprets its meaning. If your timing is off, a positive statement can have negative impact.
19) Empathy entails an act of self-awareness: we read other people by tuning in to ourselves.
20) One cost of the frenetic stream of distractions we face today, some fear, is an erosion of empathy and compassion. The more distracted we are, the less we can exhibit attunement and caring.
21) As William Osler, the father of medical residency training, wrote in 1904, a doctor should be so detached that "his blood vessels don't constrict and his heart rate remains steady when he sees terrible sights." Osler recommended doctors have the attitude of a "detached concern."
22) The most robust entity takes in the greatest amount of relevant information, understands it most deeply, and responds most nimbly.
23) Smart practice always includes a feedback loop that lets you recognize errors and correct them - which is why dancers use mirrors. (We must always learn from our mistakes)
24) Positive emotions widen our span of attention; we're free to take it all in. Indeed, in the grip of positivity, our perceptions shift. As psychologist Barbara Fredrickson, who studies positive feelings and their effects, puts it, when we're feeling good our awareness expands from our usual self-centered focus on "me" to a more inclusive and warm focus on"we".
25) ...... positivity, in turn, has great payoffs for performance, energizing us so we can focus better, think more flexibly, and persevere. (Ever wondered why successful people are always positive? I don't think they are positive because they are successful but rather it is because they are positive that they became successful)
26) "You need the negative focus to survive, but a positive one to thrive," says Boyatzis. "You need both, but in the right ratio."
That ratio would do well to flip far more to the positive than the negative, in light of what's known as the "Losada effect," after Marcial Losada, an organizational psychologist who studied emotions in high-performing business teams. Analyzing hundreds of teams, Losada determined that the most effective had a positive/negative ratio of at least 2.9 good feelings to every negative moment (there's an upper limit to positivity: above a Losada ratio of about 11:1, teams apparently become too giddy to be effective). The same ratio range holds for people who flourish in life, according to research by Barbara Fredrickson, who is a psychologist at the University of North Carolina (and a former research associate of Losada). (A balance between negative and positve feelings is important and successful people is generally more positive)
27) Global economic data shows that once a country reaches a modest level of income - enough to meet basic needs - there is zero connection between happiness and wealth. Intangibles like warm connections with people we love and meaningful activities make people far happier than say, shopping or work.
28) Directing attention toward where it needs to go is a primal task of leadership. Talent here lies in the ability to shift attention to the right place at the right time, sensing trends and emerging realities and seizing opportunities. (Leaders take note. One of our main task is to keep the team focus and at the same time are attuned to others and the outside world)
29) Leadership itself hinges on effectively capturing and directing the collective attention. Leading attention requires these elements: first, focusing your own attention, then attracting and directing attention from others, and getting and keeping the attention of employees and peers, of customers or clients.
30) ...... "deciding what not to do is as important as deciding what to do."
31) "The most successful leaders are constantly seeking out new information," says Ruth Malloy, global director of Hay Group's leadership and talent practice.
32) ..... nonacademic abilities like empathy typically outweigh purely cognitive talents in the makeup of outstanding leaders. (We all know why academic abilities alone would not guarantee future success. So, remember to always hone your soft skills like empathy, communication, etc.)
33) Baron-Cohen's research finds that in a small - but significant - number of people this strength (excels at systems analysis) comes coupled with a blind spot for what other people are feeling and thinking, and for reading social situations. For that reason, while people with superior systems understanding are organizational assets, they are not necessarily effective leaders if they lack the requisite emotional intelligence.
In summary, the book is timely for this generation which are constantly distracted. When we say focus, it is not merely at work or the task at hand. It encompasses every aspects of our life. When we are focused on our relationship, the relationship would flourish and we would have meaningful and quality connections with the people we love and care about. If we are distracted, what we have would be superficial connections and it is therefore, not surprising if the relationship do not work out or we feel something is missing. The same thing applies to work, the environment, etc. In summary, we should FOCUS on things that matter in our life, work, etc. during our short adventure on earth and hope that when we leave, we would leave our mark here, in a positive manner of course.
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